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The Father Factor: The Official Blog of National Fatherhood Initiative

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Boys will be violent...

  
  
  
By now, you may have seen news reports regarding the brutal beating death in Chicago of 16-year-old Fenger HS honor student, Derrion Albert. If you haven't, you certainly will, because someone captured the tragic events on a cellphone. The footage shows a group of male teens kicking and striking Albert with splintered railroad ties during the attack.

Boys will not just be boys. Too often, boys will be violent--deadly violent-- especially if they don’t have the guiding hand of a good father. My sense is that you won’t have to do too much investigating to connect the perpetrators of this heinous act to a family cycle of fatherlessness. This was certainly the case with the DC sniper shootings. In fact, research shows that male inmates overwhelming come from father-absent homes. A key and essential role of a good father is to teach his son how to use his power and strength in the right way.

Interestingly, boys are often encouraged--as is evident from the gang that attacked Albert--to define themselves by how they use their power. Real men, and good fathers in particular, define themselves by their ability to restrain and direct their power in the best interest of themselves, their families, and their communities. Indeed, the real difference between boys and men is the ability to say “no” to the wrong things and “yes” to the right things.

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